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parakhidotcom
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Posted on 09-01-11 10:13
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http://www.parakhi.com/blogs/2011/08/31/what-part-of-teej-is-for-women/
(Here is the full article adhering to sajha posting guidelines)
What part of Teej is for women?
By Saani | Published August 31, 2011
So, before writing this post I need to clarify that I don’t know much about Teej. I wasn’t born or raised in a family that celebrates Teej and I’ve never taken part in any of the festivities. What I have gathered is this: Parvati wanted a good husband so she fasted and Shiva was so impressed by her devotion he decided to make her his bride. As religion settled into tradition, I’m led to believe that till date women still fast during Teej – married women for the well being of their spouse and unmarried women in hope of a good catch.
The funny thing is, when talking about Teej I’ve seen a lot of people sum it up as a “women’s festival” but the more I ask questions and the more I see groups of women taking over streets in their heavy ornaments and glittery red saris I start thinking: This is a festival for MEN, but with all female participation.
Sure, it’s a time for women to get together, but the aim isn’t to empower the finer sex, it doesn’t strive to bring equality, nor does it try to remove the foot of patriarchy that is still stepping on them. If anything, it’s yet another Nepali tradition where men are lauded as gods and where lowly women are to fast and show their devotion to husbands and future husbands.
As a non-Hindu, modern, educated woman, I’ll look at Teej and say a loud, “No thank you”. (Plus, why do we womenfolk need an excuse to get together and have some fun of our own?)
My further issues with this festival include the worship of Shiva’s “manhood”, I mean, if you’re engaging in sexually activity and you’re pleased, go ahead and tell your man just how happy he makes you, but to worship a stone that is symbolic of male reproductive organs unsettles me just the slightest bit.
Let me be frank and pose a question – is there anywhere in Hinduism that celebrates a vagina?
Maybe there is, but I’ve never heard of such a thing, and if such a thing does exist, it certainly does not garner as much attention as Shiva’s piece. I mean, really, could you be any more sexist than to worship his schlong? It isn’t even a suggestion, or symbolic, or nor does it leave room for sexual innuendos because it is just… so… blatant.
Ugh.
So, besides fasting for a man, pouring milk over a phallic stone, the third component of Teej that I’ve heard about is the eating, or perhaps I should say overeating. I believe there was an episode of Tito Sattya last year that comically warned women of the tendency to be gluttonous. In fact, if I’m not mistaken, I read something in the paper of women dying from eating too much – does that mean everlasting prosperity for their husbands since she must have done some serious fasting?
What really disappoints me about this is that women continue to subject themselves to “traditions” of this nature. I’m not saying that we should eradicate all the chapters of our “culture” that are Hindu and in high favor of men, I’m just suggesting a few edits. If the Vatican (in all their ever so embedded traditionalist and conservative ways) can bend their stance on contraception (even if it’s only to allow male prostitutes to wear a condom in order to risk being infected with HIV), I don’t see why some changes can’t be brought into the way we celebrate our culture.
I propose a day FOR women, to celebrate her work, her trials, her love, her care, her hardships, to really appreciate the goddess in her. And it would be better if women AND men were to take part.
Saani has no real goals and aspirations but she sees opportunity in everything and goes with the flow. This is probably because she loves exploring and discovering. She writes for fun but for the same reason she also cooks, reads, and spends a lot of time on random websites that offer a chance to learn all sorts of tid-bits on life!
http://www.parakhi.com/blogs/
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shiva_linga
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Posted on 09-01-11 10:22
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'Let me be frank and pose a question \u2013 is there anywhere in Hinduism that celebrates a vagina?'
Ya, hinduism celebrates vagina.Without a 'yoni'(which is vagina), Shivalinga is not complete/holy. Its the fusion of both.
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Chimse_Keto
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Posted on 09-01-11 10:58
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to me, Shiva linga is symbolic of exual intercourse. Its intact into Vagina and the message is keep sexting each other whenever you get a chance, lol.
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Nepali_American
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Posted on 09-01-11 12:28
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I have just become a fan of the writer, "Saani" and via her, also of Parakhi.com.
Kudos to Saani on her brilliant social criticism. Naam-le saani, tara dimaag-le ta thuli rahecha.
Looking forward to more such articles.
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Stiffler
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Posted on 09-01-11 1:32
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Your article epitomes what I hate about the liberal idealism. Thoughts like these will certainly eradicate whatever we have left of our culture.
First of all religious scriptures and beliefs were constructed hundreds and thousands of years ago; essence of which we still practice today. While there are many quirks associated with them, one good thing they do is they bring us together and give us a group identity. If you start dissecting each religion, everything it celebrates will have some evil association. Why celebrate christmas when it promotes greed? Eid promotes sacrifice of sheep because Abraham was almost going to kill his son, wait that sounds bad…doesn’t it? Why celebrate Dashain-Diwali when it promotes war not peace?
Teej, by its strict definitions, will definitely promote some form of male superiority. But is it that bad really? One day of fasting will actually help your body, not harm it. You say it is a festival for Men. What do men really get out of it? It’s not as if we get to eat your portion of food, is it? It’s the women who gather around, dance and sing to celebrate this festival; why make it look bad by pointing out the negativity which you might or might not even believe in.
I defend teej because it is one quentisential Nepali festival besides Shiva Ratri. Dashain and Diwali are celebrated elsewhere; but when you goto a temple in Teej, all the women wearing red sarees you will find will predominantly be Nepali. Nepali coming together in Nepal or abroad, having fun, singing/dancing and rekindling that Nepal’s essence; and you are against it?
Thanks but no thanks; we like it the way it is.
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stifflers_mom
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Posted on 09-01-11 8:29
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It is sad when an "educated" woman like her who is trying to appear to be liberal and open-minded, has such an incredibly narrow view of something as amazing as Teej! I'm not female, but it's hardly a secret that Teej is one festival that women are really excited about. And it is one of those festivals where it's not forced upon anyone, even younger girls like to take part because of the fun aspect of it. It is definitely all about women, where the part about doing it for the men is almost only just a bonus. "Plus, why do we womenfolk need an excuse to get together and have some fun of our own?" Then why not just cancel dashain and tihar and all the others. Because ultimately all these festivals are merely communal activities that bring people together to celebrate! And if the writer is worried about women's rights, there are plenty of women's issues in Nepal that need way more attention than a festival of celebration exclusively for women.
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Pulsar_Beat
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Posted on 09-01-11 8:49
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Saani's piece was brilliant but so were the rebuttals of stiffler and stiffler's Mom ;). Now the onus is on Saani, if not Parakhi.com's other parakhis to come and rescue her from her spilt milk before she gets drowned in it.
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Bad Boy
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Posted on 09-01-11 8:53
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It sounds like a essay written by a high school student for her english class.
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abinabh
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Posted on 09-01-11 9:53
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Saani, looks like you have got talent. Pour it with other issues. What I feel is you already know the answers to the questions you are asking us to answer. That will certainly help you move further in your writiings. I don't think women are punished for not fasting on the day of Teej.Of course, this festival, like many other Nepalese festivals, remains as a tradtion. With time, people are modifying it to make more sensible. Now, if you just want to change the world in a day, good luck, but it's no use. Like Stiffler said, " If you start dissecting each religion, everything it celebrates will have some evil association." I forgot the names exactly, but even with Greek Gods, did not one of the Gods marry or have children from his own mother ? So what, should we neglect all Greek mythology about Gods. If you begin with questions like "Why is that only women need to give birth to child ? Why can't men ?" You know the answers.
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Helpless
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Posted on 09-02-11 2:56
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guhyeshwari_Temple
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copycat
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Posted on 09-02-11 9:20
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You did not grow up where teej is celebrated. So you do not know about teej. YOU said that.
नजाने गाउको बाटो नसोध्नु
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magorkhe1
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Posted on 09-02-11 11:17
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बुझ्नेलाई स्रिखन्ड अरुलाई खुर्पाको बिड।
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mangale
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Posted on 09-03-11 1:31
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mangale
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Posted on 09-03-11 1:40
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"Let me be frank and pose a question – is there anywhere in Hinduism that celebrates a vagina? "
Saani Naani, I just bought a silicon vagina from adam&eves.com and I am going to celebrate it every night until I get married, A true Hindu. Thank you.
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rabi4
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Posted on 09-11-11 6:16
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natyavaruval
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Posted on 09-11-11 9:10
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Parvathi Devi is a Supreme teacher, She teach us how to worship God. And thats mandatory..
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grgDai
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Posted on 09-22-11 9:42
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Love some of the writings from parakhi writers but they only post here. Would love to hear their responses to some comments.
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rabi4
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Posted on 09-24-11 5:41
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Grgdai, thanks for liking the blogs posts from parakhi.com/blogs. We are encouraging our writers to reply to the comments/feedback posted by readers in sajha forum. Hope our writers will also share their views with you in the future.
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